Update from 10/9 post

My new goal after some much needed Jesus slobbering, pillow soaking, singing at the top of my lungs time, is to laugh and laugh and laugh. I just want to live and breath my God given blessings and gifts. I am tired of my robbed lifestyle. It is time to live! Unashamed. Unscarred. Free. Full of grace. Ready to give it away.

Super Mom????

I don't have time for the gym anymore, but I definitely need it, so I have tried to think of a way to exercise without going to the gym, with a 2 year old. I don't think I can push him in the stroller while running...not to mention, he doesn't want to ride around in the stroller. The little time we are home and playing outside, he wants to be in his sandbox or writing with chalk. So today I ran the perimeter of our backyard while he played in the sandbox! I felt so stupid, but very accomplished! I EXERCISED WHILE GREY PLAYED!!!! Yippee! I am very curious to the thoughts of my passersby. I laugh out loud thinking about it! It was funny because I didn't expect a personal trainer for my home workout but I got one! Grey was saying "go mommy go!" and "come on mommy!" the whole time. He ran with me! It was fun.

Stupid #2:
I was pushing Grey on the swing...he likes to go"super fast"
so I push him and say it is super fast. Well this afternoon I learned why to push the swing and not the bottom of the baby. In my most excited "mommy super hero voice" I counted down 5-4-3-2-1 but instead of blast off...my baby was pushed onto the ground! I 100% knew we were going to the hospital to get a cast on his wrist. I must have been pale as a ghost! As I am investigating his entire body, he cries ( I think from pain) that he wants to go super fast and starts the countdown over! His goes something like this, "3-4-2-1". Oh my sweet baby boy. I didn't know if I should laugh or cry, so I just pushed super high like the super mom I am!

Roller Coaster

This entry is in pink, because that's a girl color and this is all about me! This week I have cried my eyes out, been rescued by my knight, then let off the hook. Maybe I was overreacting to failing my midterm, but turns out, the computer graded it wrong. Somehow, even hindsight, doesn't make me feel bad for screaming and crying about a 67!
Why does everything has to be so crazy in life? Rick Warren described life, not as peaks and valleys, but as a two way railroad track. We are always either just coming out of a trial, in the middle of a trial, or getting ready to go into one. Life constantly changes and teaches. Happiness is not the goal, but my goal is Christ-likeness in character. Lord, make that true in my life! I would love to be in a place where my circumstances are not all that I can see. The Lord is in all things. His ways are good and my ways are...NOT!

God has opened my eyes this week to one way I perceive myself. It isn't pretty. I didn't ask Him to reveal this ugliness to me, but somehow He thought it time for me to see. The truth is God loves me (or doesn't love me) not for my broken glass, shattered dreams, and hopelessness. He loves me because He created me. He sees me white because Jesus died for me. When will I believe? I want to see others as He has graciously seen me...without judgement and blame. With a pure heart. I don't want to constantly compete to be enough or to be above who I think I am. I am who God says I am and I don't need to work for worthiness of those claims. whew. I sigh with relieve and now I have to get back to life...it is called laundry! Oh! Before I quit, I want to share about my knight. He's no secret...He is my adoring husband. I love him so much and am so thankful for his sensitive heart and gentle words. I love when God uses him to reflect true, unconditional love. Hmm..mmm feels good.

Imagination Blast Off!

This entry is to share Grey's recent bubble of imagination. I was in the living room folding the recently dried clothes when I hear, "Mommy, I'm in the airplane" Grey was in the dryer! He was so cute and truly believed he was flying the airplane, then my little pilot had to eat lunch, which he described at "belicious!". A couple of evenings ago, we sat down to eat supper and Grey said "blessing mommy?", so we folded our hands and said the blessing. He has never shown much interest in the blessing before. Afterwards, he clasped his hands and asked, "like this Mommy?". Then he said, "do it again!" So we blessed the food twice. Since he is 2 and we have to do all things 20 times, I was thankful we only said the blessing 2 times! Tucking Grey in, Josh said "Jesus loves you Grey" and he said "Jesus loves me. I am special". It's sinking in! Don't get too mushy though because on another night, when he wasn't feeling as generous, I tried to strike a cleaning deal. I said, "deal?" and he was quick to reply, "no deal, Mommy, no deal". Josh and I could hardly contain our laughter!

Last Sunday, Grey helped me prepare food for the youth group. When he dropped something, he said "sorry bout that"! How funny.

Right now, everything that makes noise outside is a peacock. I have no idea why...I didn't even know peacocks made noise! On our way to school Tuesday, Grey was pointing out the window at nothing in particular when he suddenly exclaimed, "Bicycle!" A few seconds later, "Lollipop, haircut!" Then he died laughing. He thinks everything is hilarious. He makes yummy tea in his sandbox, but makes sure I know it is pretend. He told me the berry he was holding this morning was a pretend lollipop but then he took a bite out of it! yikes. He makes roads out of my shoes...lots and lots of shoes. I am so tired of picking up my shoes, but it is too fun to make him stop.

One last story...Grey told me that I was irresistible while we were playing, because I tell him that regularly. I was texting Josh to tell him that Grey called me that great word. As I'm texting, I was sounding out the word to spell it, and Grey finished it for me "ible". I thought that was pretty neat!

His big word right now is "awesome". Have no idea where he gets that! :) wink. Imagination is so much fun, even if it is boy stuff!